In my May 4th post, “My terminator cousin is marrying an Indian human,” I wrote about my cousin Silvia preparing for her wedding to Sanjeev. We just found out we’re going to have another wedding in the family.
Hal and his boyfriend Christian are getting married!! They’ve been dating for three years now and are the cutest couple. After Barack Obama said he supported same-sex marriage, our community talked about the subject a lot. Most friends said they approved of gay marriage. Hal thought our friends wouldn’t come to the wedding or would alienate the family (LOL ALIENate!!) But now he isn’t afraid and wants to make it official.
Mom and Dad were beaming!! Mom called all her friends and cried for I don’t know how long. Even my great-great grandmother Ellen Ripley, the crankiest woman ever, said it was about time they got married! And she hates weddings!
But Nana really likes Christian who’s also alien-human. She and Christian always talk about science since he’s an alien neurologist. That’s a lotta brain to deal with!
Luckily Hal, Christian and I have something very important in common—fashion, of course! Hal and Christian always look through Vogue and Elle with me. We go shopping together a lot too. Hal has bought me the cutest outfits including my only Betsey Johnson.
And they picked me as the maid of honor!! They have such amazing taste, so my dress will be gorgeous! OMG. I will look stunning. I’ll need tons of photos of myself in the dress to use as headshots.
Maria will be one of the bridesmaids, and she will ruin the whole day. She’ll probably insist on wearing a black depressing dress and her horrifying black lipstick. Did I tell you she dyed her gorgeous blond hair pitch black?? Fail.
Elizabeth and Dana will be the flower girls. Luckily, Dana’s terminator jaw implant helps her overbite, so she won’t drool all over the outfit. Seems like all alien babies have drooling problems.
This is so exciting! My first time being a maid of honor! They haven’t picked a date yet which is fine. I need a lot of time to help them plan!!
Maybe they can change this wedding cake to two aliens on top: